Haphephobia: A fear of being touched.
Personal space is a good thing.
I'm as antisocial and interaction avoidant as the next person (especially if the next person is a crochety recluse who only communicates with the outside world via the internet unless she really can't avoid it)
However, even I can see that there seems to be a bit of an out break of haphephobia in western society today.
Unless we are drunk or in some other way chemically numbed to it we seem to have a horror of being touched by strangers. No! I don't mean just in a creepy who's hand is that on my bum Kinda way! I mean that we now seem to regard close proximity of another human being whether accidental, circumstantial or (god forbid) on purpose as some sort of hideous social foe-par or worse a violating personal attack. There is countless information on-line on the rules of personal space.
So in a spacious building or outdoor area these guidelines may seem workable even reasonable.
However we live in an over crowded world people so sometimes when what we all really want is this...
What we actually get is this...
Just look at their faces the quiet reconciliation to the horror. Everyone determinedly avoiding eye contact looking at phones, books, their own reflection in the window. But NOT. I REPEAT NOT !AT ANYBODY ELSE ! Don't look! Don't Smile! Do not ,on pain of death, attempt to strike up a conversation on the weather or how late the bus was!! What were you thinking you FREAK???? Hold in your extremities. Make yourself as small as possible and you may just get through this hellish experience without having to feel the sickening warmth of a strangers rain dampened limb against yours.
Now I mock but I'm feeling you people.
Because secretly my Idea world looks a bit like this...
Only the guy in the hospital scrubs would be David Tennant and there wouldn't be any zombies (except for me of course)
But putting up with these little inconveniences (which is really all they are) is just part of living in a busy society. If can't take it go move to some remote Scottish Island.
DON'T DO THIS!!!
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Or this
I know you don't WANT someone to sit next to you! I don't WANT to sit next to you ether!!
But god damn it I paid for my ticket too and I have a right to a seat!!!!
Quiet frankly hogging an extra seat on crowded public transport make's you a selfish ignorant tosser.
Everybody's thinking it! Everyone on the train/bus/tube is silently tutting to themselves and thinking Wanker!
Of course nobody is going to say anything to you as we're all afraid that the sort of blatant sociopath who thinks its OK to leave old ladies and pregnant women standing just so their knock off Gucci handbag or imaginary friend Clive can have a seat to themselves. Will inevitably turn abusive and violent if someone should dare to attempt to burst their little bubble of antisocial self importance.
But I just want you to know that we all hate you OK even Clive hates you and he gets to sit on his 40 minute journey though hell.
I'm a sensitive soul really.
It's not fair that I should have to feel angry vibes of irritation directed at me when ever I sit next to someone in what was unfortunately the only spare seat available. It's gotten so bad now that I automatically mutter an awkward "Sorry." as I sit down next to someone.
WHY????!!!
Why am I sorry? Don't I have as much right to be there as you? Didn't I pay my fair? Am I not HUMAN???
OK deep breaths Release the anger
Try looking at this....
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Even Kittens have issues nowadays!
We're all doooooooomed!
